Post-Grad Blues

I wrote a Facebook post years ago after graduating college about “Fight or Flight” after undergrad. Fight or Flight is usually mentioned in reference to your natural reaction after a traumatic experience, but I used this analogy in reference to what seemed to be the only reliable options for me after graduating college- fighting in the military or flying as a flight attendant.  I ended up deleting that post in fear that I was offending any of my social media followers who were in the service or flight attendants; but it still weighed heavy on my mind after I received so many responses from post-grads who related to the notion that they didn’t have many options after receiving their degrees.

Let me drop a few facts and statistics before I hammer my main sentiments home. My parents are Baby boomers (born between 1946-1964) and their generation instilled the values of, "get a good education and get a good, well-paying job after" into my generation. Now imagine having that implanted in your subconscious all throughout your childhood and into your teens and early adult years, only to discover it may just be an antiquated recipe for success. When my parents were coming up through high school, a high school graduate earned 77 percent of what a college graduate made. Fast forward to the present, a high school diploma will statistically only get you 62% of what a college graduate will earn. Now let's take a closer look at millennial college grads. A whopping 88 percent of minimum-wage workers are 20 years or older and 4 in 10 of those workers are college graduates. These stats alone, are enough to make an upbeat college grad sad, but what can we do?

Image by: Lauren Cronan @curate_rva

“After graduating high school, college, grad school or really any milestone in life, we find ourselves at a cross-roads wondering, “which way next?”

I found myself back at home after graduating college and it was honestly one of the lowest times in my life. I had all these high hopes and dreams for my life that I thought I was pushing toward during my undergraduate career. Life has a way of smacking you in the face once you're outside of your comfort zone. There was no longer a solid structure for my life. I no longer had a busy class schedule to balance with internships, side hustles and club/organization meetings.

I applied to countless jobs all over the country only to receive a trickle of responses that usually started with, "thanks for applying, but we have decided to go with another candidate." I equated my worth with my job title or lack thereof. I was not myself during that time. I remember sleeping in until 1 pm. Always feeling tired for no apparent reason. I lost my drive and my ambition. I would cry uncontrollably and for no apparent reason. I didn't want to go anywhere with virtually anyone and my poor family did their best to try to lift my spirits. This was such a foreign feeling to me because I was always known as the one "who had it together." 

The truth in all this is that post grad blues stems from a lot more than not being able to find a job. I'm extremely prideful in being a millennial even though my generation receives tremendous flack (no different from previous generations, no doubt, when they were at the cusp of bringing about change). My generation gets the bad rep of being lazy, entitled and self-righteous, but I beg to differ! We were raised to think that a college education was the golden ticket to success and when it didn't work out that way -- we are instantly slapped on the wrist and told that we're entitled.

I can firmly attest to the fact that a strong majority of my peers are passion-driven, go-getters. We realize that "hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard." We now realize that a framed piece of paper merely validates us among the educated, but does not entitle us to success. I know so many people who have charted their own map to success and blazed a new trail to ensure their passions coincide with a reliable stream of income. I truly believe post-graduate depression can be alleviated once we tackle the mentality we drive into our children. A student's ego shouldn't have to plummet once the confetti settles at graduation and a debt-burdened 20-something kid is left thinking, "What's next?"

It was maybe a year or two after graduating that I realized I wasn't the only one to experience this post-grad funk. There were countless others who shared my story. The ambitious, recent college grad who hit what seemed like a dead-end in life or quarter-life-crisis. I vowed then to share my story unashamedly and hope that in the process of me sharing my story I would give someone some solace that they were not alone.

As I always say, I do not have it all figured out. I can be transparent and say I am scared about my life post-graduate school. But I do know that no matter what, my life is in God's hands and I will continue to allow Him to order my steps!

We are all on the journey called life together and if we can help each other along, it could make the path much smoother. 

- Reesie